Magicka patch notes are just as hilarious as the actual game

Omri Petitte at

Magicka

Arrowhead's fourth-wall-busting, spell-slinging adventure Magicka received a new entry in its arcane codex of patch notes today. But in true Magicka fashion, the fixed bugs and slight tweaks were cheekily presented alongside an abundance of flavor text carrying Arrowhead's snappy wit.

The full patch notes are below.

- Added some missing characters to certain fonts. Continuing our commitment to offering characters to all fonts everywhere.
- Fixed a pathfinding crash. Took us a bit, but we found it.
- Fixed disappearing boss Vlad. Turns out he was just at the bar up the street.
- Fixed a crash when killing frozen Khan (and possibly other bosses). KHAAAAAAN!
- Fixed camera issue when being revived by the fairy. Fairies weren’t previously aware of auto-focus.
- Fixed NPC spellcaster AI sometimes freezing up. After taking some public speaking classes, though, the NPC finally warmed up.
- Mobs are now able to spawn their own kind upon death. That sounds kinda gross, actually.
- Added some new functionality to scene scripts. Scene scripts run. Run, scripts, run!
- Reduced the physical damage resistance of Enraged Goblin Warlocks. Let’s face it, Warlocks sound all-powerful but they’re really just a bunch of pansies.
- Fixed a localization crash. Que haya sido reparado.
- Fixed a crash with the Performance Enchantment magick. Talk to your doctor first.
- Fixed a crash that occurred when firing a water projectile during a level transition. That’ll show those pesky levels who’s boss around here.
- Fixed an issue with collision checks that resulted in multiple fall damage. Large Hadron Collider consulted, collisions now in check.
- Fixed certain lights being removed when restarting a scene. Disco disco, good good.
- Fixed scores being inconsistent between client and host in challenges. Issues resolved with just a couple trust falls.
- Fixed script delays being reset when restarting a challenge level. No more delays, the movie will finally be coming out soon.
- Fixed element icons getting stuck highlighted when disabled (as in Elemental Roulette). Now if we could only get our car’s dome light to turn off.
- Fixed a crash where players were gripped during level transition. Now they’ll just be gripped in anticipation, amirite?!
- General stability improvements.