You ever notice how much more crouch walking you do in games than real life

MGS4
(Image credit: Konami)

I feel like I've spent several lifetimes crouch walking around to be sneaky in videogames. It's the default way of saying "stealth mode." Even the mighty Metal Gear series, which originally only had upright running or belly crawling, eventually bent the knee—both of them, in fact.

Haven you ever tried crouch walking? Like, in real life. Go ahead and do it right now wherever you're reading this: In class, at work, on the bus, on the John, I'll wait. Didn't feel very sneaky, did you?

I feel like the only games I've ever seen comment on the impracticality were New Vegas and The Outer Worlds 2. In the former, Raul complains about his bad knees sometimes when you stealth while he's following. In the latter, "bad knees" is a tradeoff trait you can get where your creaky joints can alert enemies when you drop into a crouch.

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Ted Litchfield
Associate Editor

Ted has been thinking about PC games and bothering anyone who would listen with his thoughts on them ever since he booted up his sister's copy of Neverwinter Nights on the family computer. He is obsessed with all things CRPG and CRPG-adjacent, but has also covered esports, modding, and rare game collecting. When he's not playing or writing about games, you can find Ted lifting weights on his back porch. You can follow Ted on Bluesky.

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