With Destiny 2 scented candles, Bungie can finally join you for bath time

Put down those delicious Pop Tarts and take a final swig of that refreshing, energizing Rockstar energy drink! The brand has expanded.

Destiny 2 scented candles have finally arrived. While I wash away the dirt and grime from a long day at the game news quarry, nothing eases the tension better than the warm, enveloping scent of Spinmetal and Helium Filaments. Breathe deep, hold it, hold it, hold it—and exhale. No, you’re not coughing up blood. Those are the toxins, the bad toxins.

In partnership with Activision and Bungie, Numskull is releasing a series of official Destiny 2 products, including a set of scented candles, and the perfect instrument for murder: a tiny Ghost candelabra. There’s the usual assortment of mugs and keychains too, but these candles might be the best branded merchandise I’ve seen in all my years. Second up is the Destiny 2 bathrobe, which I fully intend to play Destiny 2 in. I can see it now, a tumbler of Rockstar, Pop Tart hors d'oeuvres—s’mores or bust—and the invigorating scent of Wormspore slowly dissolving my lungs.

The scents are based on the crafting resources available from each planet from the original Destiny, which isn’t the most inventive or up-to-date aroma design in the candle industry, but I suppose they’re better than no Destiny candles at all.

Earth – Spinmetal: A fresh aromatic blend of cut cedarwood and sandalwood infused with a sweet pine and warm resinous accords, mossy earthy tones in the base.

The Moon – Helium Filaments: Warm smoky accords fill the air and the comforting sound of crackling woods balanced with the rich amber and warm vanilla.

Mars – Relic Iron: Fresh and sappy green cactus layered with a warm floralcy of white flowers, tuberose, jasmine and rose.

Venus – Spirit Bloom: A refreshing white floral bouquet, jasmine, plumeria and orchid blossoms topped with citrus mandarin and bergamot. Shimmering white musk with a hint of coconut on the breeze.

The Dreadnaught – Wormspore: A comforting aroma with spicy and smoky notes. Woody mossy tones in the base topped with citrus.

Not satisfied with such a lazy take on Destiny scents, I put out a call in the PC Gamer Slack for better ideas. Our ideas were not better:

Apples — It smells like apples, but apples from the distant future.

New Spaceship — A sterile, cozy aroma with notes of zero gravity and bleach.

Xur’s Dirty Old Jacket — Leads with a mildew bouquet and finishes with notes of the weekend.

Eau de Grind — Unscented.

And we extend the call to you, readers. While we’ll all certainly be buying a set or four (I take a lot of baths), what scent names and descriptions best suit the world of Destiny 2?

James is stuck in an endless loop, playing the Dark Souls games on repeat until Elden Ring and Silksong set him free. He's a truffle pig for indie horror and weird FPS games too, seeking out games that actively hurt to play. Otherwise he's wandering Austin, identifying mushrooms and doodling grackles.