Fight terrifying physics robots in the best action-platformer you've probably never played

I have to tell you about Intrusion 2, because it's like a game from my stupid dreams about games that couldn't exist. It's a platformer where everything is physically modelled: your little commando runs around and shoots dudes, but every limb of those dudes is an object that can collide with obstacles and be knocked around mid-animation.

More importantly, so is every limb of the increasingly ridiculous robot monsters you fight, which scramble intelligently across the changing scenery to hurl things at you, breathe plasma and stab you with their robot tails. Ironically for robots, I don't think I've ever seen videogame enemies seem so alive. They adapt to whatever impossible bit of terrain you try to trap them in and hunt you relentlessly. The only time they struggle to get somewhere is after you've blown at least half their limbs off, and they still do it so convincingly that it's almost disturbing.

Here I am fighting two horrible robot physics dogs:

It gets better: you can also pilot terrifying physics robots. The coolest enemy I've fought is the grappling mech: a dreadnought-like walker with a claw that works like Half-Life 2's Gravity Gun. Then you get in one. But unlike Half-Life 2, this is a world where everything that moves is fair game for your claw, and almost anything you try is incredible fun. In this video, I accidentally flying-kick two different people to death:

The most common thing said over the shoulder of someone playing Intrusion 2 is "How is this not the best game ever?" The answer is basically that it's bastard hard, and that sometimes gets frustrating. I strongly recommend playing on 'Low' difficulty. It's still challenging, but you'll get to all the cool bits shown above—and a boss who uses a disco ball to refract her giant laser beam—without too much trouble. Even on Low, though, I am hopelessly stuck on this guy:

Play the demo, then tell everyone you know.