Lincoln Carpenter

Lincoln Carpenter

News Writer

Lincoln has been writing about games for 12 years—unless you include the essays about procedural storytelling in Dwarf Fortress he convinced his college professors to accept. Leveraging the brainworms from a youth spent in World of Warcraft to write for sites like Waypoint, Polygon, and Fanbyte, Lincoln spent three years freelancing for PC Gamer before joining on as a full-time News Writer in 2024, bringing an expertise in Caves of Qud bird diplomacy, getting sons killed in Crusader Kings, and hitting dinosaurs with hammers in Monster Hunter.

Latest articles by Lincoln Carpenter

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Destiny 2 players are learning how to crack into its infamous content vault by tinkering with old game builds

By Lincoln Carpenter Published

News Two months after it entered purgatory, Destiny 2's community archaeologists are creating tools for exploring its long-absent worlds.

News
A high school age baseball player in Ball Boy Simulator, with the sun setting in the background.
'Wait for me, my Czech friend': Japanese dev adds Czech localization just for the one Steam user who wishlisted his game in the Czech Republic

By Lincoln Carpenter Published

News The international spirit of baseball and friendship might frown on the method, though.

15 Comments
News
Microsoft's Xbox 360 game console is introduced during a press preview on May 13, 2005 in Tokyo, Japan.
Microsoft is planning to bring Xbox 360 games to PC, according to leaked documents

By Lincoln Carpenter Published

News The feature is expected to get a "gradual" launch between 2027 and 2028.

15 Comments
News
Key art for Champions Tactics: Grimoria Chronicles, showing a sorceress holding some sort of accursed gemerald.
Ubisoft's NFT tactics game, a thing that still exists, is shutting down in October

By Lincoln Carpenter Published

News Technically, it shed its Web3 functionality in May, but it didn't seem to help much.

8 Comments
News
Hearthstone card art of Patchwerk.
Former WoW designer says Blizzard had no way to measure maximum player DPS while building early raids—so the studio enlisted its strongest sickos to grind target dummies

By Lincoln Carpenter Published

News When in doubt, do your own DPS and round up.

News
The Godot logo imposed over the complaint tablet to Ea-Nasir.
Godot natively supports coding in Sumero-Akkadian Cuneiform, if you needed another reason to switch game engines

By Lincoln Carpenter Published

News Take cognizance that (from now on) I will not accept here any code that is not of fine quality.

15 Comments
News
A truck delivering a giant, severed hand in Prospice: Anomalous Logistics.
This upcoming Steam game is pioneering the accursed trucking genre, and as a former delivery guy I could not be more thrilled

By Lincoln Carpenter Published

News Prospice: Anomalous Logistics simulates the canonical deliveryman experience of having your dreambody dissolved in the labyrinth of collective death.

News
Panthalus, a godly whale Pal in Palworld.
Latest Palworld patch keeps Victor & Shadowbeak from accidentally teleporting out of existence, prevents Panthalus from breaking everything

By Lincoln Carpenter Published

News Palworld's bosses should be a bit more predictable.

News
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WoW Classic's latest patch is terrorizing hardcore players with bugged piles of underground enemies, and it's likely due to a decades-old quirk of Blizzard programming

By Lincoln Carpenter Published

News The Stonetalon Mountains are up to their old tricks again.

News
A book burning on a rock by the coast.
AI companies are anonymously buying and destroying millions of books through middleman services to avoid headlines about AI companies buying and destroying millions of books

By Lincoln Carpenter Published

News Booksellers say they're facing a sudden surge of orders for seemingly random rare books—and fear they might be profiting from their destruction.

52 Comments
News
Sjoerd De Jong
After leaving Epic Games last month, its former 'Unreal evangelist' is now building his own game engine

By Lincoln Carpenter Published

News Sjoerd De Jong aims to combat game development "stagnation" he says has emerged from Epic and Unity market dominance.

36 Comments
News
The character Sans, of Undertale fame.
'Wtf is going on': Indie dev discovers their neglected Steam game is powering an Undertale multiplayer mod following its freak 1700% jump in player activity

By Lincoln Carpenter Published

News Little-known platformer Crashphalt is enjoying an unexpected popularity—but its players are enjoying something else.

News
Pikachu crying in Pokemon: The First Movie
Even Japan's patent officials seem exhausted with Nintendo's antics as they refuse its 'absurd' defense of a rejected Pokémon patent

By Lincoln Carpenter Published

News Not a good sign when official patent office communications hit you with a snarky clapback.

22 Comments
News
Naruto characters with their faces replaced by AI logos.
I regret to report that the AIs are weebs, too

By Lincoln Carpenter Published

News An April 2026 study indicates LLMs display a "disproportionate prominence of Japan" when asked questions about culture.

News
Player character Harvey Huffstone refills a gas canister in Future? No Thanks!
Indie game gets last minute Steam delay while Valve reviews its 'dozens of untextured polygons depicting ass and boobs'

By Lincoln Carpenter Published

News Future? No Thanks! is the latest game to get caught up in Steam's ambiguous content guidelines.

News
marathon thief
Marathon's experimental PvE mode is live, immediately tripling its daily player count

By Lincoln Carpenter Published

News Cryo Archive is open for all, for a limited time.

31 Comments
News
A player crouching in front of a Tocotoco in Palworld.
Palworld players have harnessed the power of selective breeding to create 'infinite bomb' Pals that can blow themselves up, repeatedly, forever

By Lincoln Carpenter Published

News Is that good?

News
A greatsword-wielding spinosaurus faces a meteor in Dinoblade.
There's a dinosaur soulslike launching on Steam this week where you're a spinosaurus swinging a greatsword with your mouth who just might be able to parry the meteor

By Lincoln Carpenter Published

News Just in case that's of interest to you.

News
The seal of the FBI; A laptop showing the Steam logo.
FBI arrests 21-year-old who allegedly stole $200,000 with malware-infected Steam games and spent the money on traceable UberEats gift cards

By Lincoln Carpenter Published

News Alleged cybercriminals have to eat, too.

31 Comments
News
A car falling off a cliff in Forza Horizon 6.
Does anyone know how to drive this thing?

By Lincoln Carpenter Published

HARD BRAKE It's increasingly looking like nobody remembers how videogames work—or cares to.

24 Comments
HARD BRAKE
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Retiring Valve programmer says 'at least one' of the studio's beloved game modes was made in secret to avoid pushback from peers

By Lincoln Carpenter Published

News Valve's mythical flat corporate structure might be somewhat less than 100% self-directed.

News
An undead dragon in Dragon's Dogma 2: Dark Arisen; a Pawn and Arisen prepare to high-five in Dragon's Dogma 2
Dragon's Dogma 2: Dark Arisen's new region and dungeons sound great, but I'm more excited to finally high-five my Pawn on command

By Lincoln Carpenter Published

News 'Tis one of a servant's many privileges.

News
A gold-skinned entity in Thousand Hells; game designer David Dunham.
The designer of cult classic King of Dragon Pass says his upcoming hellish heist game is pushing the boundaries of a concept he invented in 1999: 'There's really nothing else quite like it'

By Lincoln Carpenter Published

News Thousand Hells: The Underworld Heists is a unique enough game that it needed a new genre descriptor.

News
Palworld early access
Sick of holding F in Palworld? Change these two settings to make crafting and building less obnoxious

By Lincoln Carpenter Published

News Your fingers will thank you—no keyboard weights necessary.

News
Palworld -
Palworld revises some of its most egregious creature designs for its 1.0 release

By Lincoln Carpenter Published

News Some of Pocketpair's Pals now bear a bit less resemblance to their Pokémon predecessors.

11 Comments
News
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