EVE Online developer gets sent a bag of dicks

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Nothing sends a message like $38 worth of dicks.

EVE Online has been going through a bit of a rocky phase recently thanks to some balance changes the hardcore players aren't all too excited about. While most are voicing their concerns on the forums and subreddit, one enterprising young person decided to send a different message: a literal bag of edible dicks.

Yesterday, game designer Brenton "CCP Larrikin" Hooper posted on the EVE subreddit with a little bit of advice for the community. "Here in Iceland, we pay tax on anything that gets imported," he writes. "When it comes into the country, Customs will check for an invoice and then you have to pay them to get your stuffs (or just ask them to throw it away). If they can't find an invoice, you get a letter in the mail asking for one. There are some exceptions to needing an invoice (gifts for example) but you can only get away with that if it's near your birthday. You can authorize Customs to open up the package to find out what it is."

"Eat a bag of dicks."

sent_bag_of_dicks

That’s exactly what happened this week when Hooper received a letter from Icelandic Customs asking for an invoice. Not sure what the package could be, he had them open it up. They sent him this description. "The shipment contains: Two candy gummy bags in the shape of penises, glitter, penis shaped confetti and a coupon that says 'Eat a bag of dicks.'"

After Hooper posted to Reddit, the alleged sender of dicks appeared in the comments under the psuedonym 'sent_bag_of_dicks' to share the necessary invoice, which totalled at $38 USD worth of dicks. Sadly, it was too late. As Hooper explains in the comments, he gave Customs the order to toss his dicks.

Still, if you're looking to voice your frustration over a videogame, sending a bag of dicks isn't the worst thing you could do. Apparently, this isn't even the first time Hooper has received a dong in the mail, though this one appears to have been sent with the intent to inspire rather than criticize. And it's not even the worst thing CCP Games has received in the post according to community manager Paul "CCP Falcon" Elsy. 

"I'm honestly not willing to go into details," he writes. "Let's just say there were liquids involved."

I've reached out to sent_bag_of_dicks for comment, but my guess is this is in response to the growing dissatisfaction among many players over recent changes to EVE Online. There's several contributing factors here, including a general feeling that the new Citadels introduced two years ago aren't a good catalyst for conflict. Another of the bigger sticking points in the hardcore community has been the recent nerf to carriers in order to curb their ability to farm ISK in PvE activities which also has made them pretty weak in PvP combat, and many pilots aren't happy about that.

I just hope Icelandic Customs didn't let all those delicious dicks go to waste.

Steven Messner
Steven Messner

With over 7 years of experience with in-depth feature reporting, Steven's mission is to chronicle the fascinating ways that games intersect our lives. Whether it's colossal in-game wars in an MMO, or long-haul truckers who turn to games to protect them from the loneliness of the open road, Steven tries to unearth PC gaming's greatest untold stories. His love of PC gaming started extremely early. Without money to spend, he spent an entire day watching the progress bar on a 25mb download of the Heroes of Might and Magic 2 demo that he then played for at least a hundred hours. It was a good demo.