You can't polish a turd, but you can comprehensively upscale its textures in Red Dead Redemption 2

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This mod is very concerned with the fidelity of faeces.

Smiling cowboy Arthur Morgan.
(Image credit: Rockstar Games)

Nexus Mods user garbageman42069—you read that right—uploaded a mod titled "Comprehensive Sh-t Upscale" today, which is something that at least 42 people in the world want according to the downloads statistics at the time of writing.

"Ever ride through Valentine and wish it was MORE IMMERSIVE??" garbageman42069 writes in big, bold letters. "I PAINSTAKINGLY upscaled SEVERAL SHIT textures for the benefit of the whole RDR2 community."

The page itself has several wonderfully arranged advertisement images, promising a "comprehensive overhaul", which makes Red Dead Redemption 2s dung "shinier than ever". "Even wolf poop!" it boasts. Comprehensive indeed.

The comments page has not made me less upset or worried about this corner of the modding community. "next time upscale the air" writes Nexus Mods user frague32. Meanwhile user SaniRattani writes: "Awesome mod! Hey, could you please make a mod that upscales the meat chunks we get when [we] blow an NPC's head off with a shotgun?"

I'll let user Spifferino's comment speak for itself.

An emoji of a very upset being, cast in shadow.

(Image credit: User Spifferino on Nexus Mods)

This isn't the only contribution garbageman42069 has made to society. His other works include another Red Dead Redemption 2 mod called "2k watermelon", the innocuous "Upscaled Splashes" and "Upscaled Bullet Holes", and a mod that replaces the game's moon with an ominous floating png of Todd Howard, the much-memed director and executive producer for Skyrim and the upcoming Starfield.

I will not attempt to delve into the fascinating maze that must be the virtuoso garbageman42069's mind. I do think these mods serve to remind us that no matter how dark things get, there will always be someone who cares about the little details—someone who gives a shit.

Harvey Randall
Harvey Randall
Staff Writer

Harvey's history with games started when he first begged his parents for a World of Warcraft subscription aged 12, though he's since been cursed with Final Fantasy 14-brain and a huge crush on G'raha Tia. He made his start as a freelancer, writing for websites like Techradar, The Escapist, Dicebreaker, The Gamer, Into the Spine—and of course, PC Gamer. He'll sink his teeth into anything that looks interesting, though he has a soft spot for RPGs, soulslikes, roguelikes, deckbuilders, MMOs, and weird indie titles. He also plays a shelf load of TTRPGs in his offline time. Don't ask him what his favourite system is, he has too many.