Whisper it, but we actually really like the iPad. Mainly because it means we can pretend to be toting a tricorder, but also because there are some great little games on it, including an excellent port of Plants Vs Zombies. Plus, if you're adamantly opposed to cutting down trees, you can subscribe to our magazine via the iOS newsstand. Android lovers, don't feel left out. Search for PC Gamer Zinio, and you'll get a cross-platform, Android and Windows 7 version of the mag, too. A true wonder of the age.
Buffalo NAS Drive
It's a storage box for media files, a hard-drive with a low power processor attached. Drop all of your home movies/ gentleman's viewing material/entirely legal music selection onto it, and you can stream it to all the devices in your house without having to leave your PC on.
Turtle Beach Headset
You know those pretty shells you hold up to your ear and you can hear the sea? These are like them, except you hold them up to your ear and you can hear the sound of whatever you've plugged them into. Cons: We couldn't find a turtle anywhere.
HP Webcam HD-4110
Webcams used to be fuzzy novelties barely useful for videoconferencing with the secret council of the undying, but these days you can get a supersharp one like this for a bargainous fi fty quid. Look good, vlog, and drink the blood of the innocent.
According to budget, either in the
Gifts for a PC gamer… tough one. I guess you could get them a new PC. For around £1000 you get one about as powerful as it makes sense to buy, with an overclocked Core i7 processor, 1GB GeForce GTX 560Ti graphics card, 8GB of RAM, a 32GB SSD for the quick stuff, and a 2TB hard drive for the rest.
Han Solo in Carbonite Ice Cube Tray
Reenact that scene in Empire Strikes Back with this excellent ice-cube 'discussion piece'. Slide the tray into the freezer, shut the door and have a little cry. Later, rendezvous on Tatooine/the garden for further adventures/deliciously cold cocktails.
The Hydra's an odd one. It's a more accurate, more hardcore take on the Wii remote – a waggle wand that can sense not just motion, but position in space too. The waggle wands also function as a joypad that's been split down the middle. Result.
Blue Microphones Snowball Microphone
The word 'microphone' doesn't really make sense in this case. Blue's Snowball Microphone is neither micro nor a phone, preferring instead to capture your voice and record it in super-high quality. But it will make you feel like Elvis (or is that just us?)
Baconnaise is bacon-flavoured mayonnaise, and (stop being sick back there) Tim said it's delicious. Then he fell over and clutched his chest while his eyes went all big and goggly. Try some! No go on, it's, erm, nice.
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Samsung Galaxy S2
Modern mobiles are practically portable PCs, able to hook into your World of Warcraft auctions, Battlefield clan logs, and Minecraft Facebook pages. This Android phone from Samsung is especially beautiful, with a dual core processor and newfangled AMOLED screen that's easily better than an iPhone.