Which game should Thanos appear in next?

Did you hear they added Thanos to Fortnite? Oh, you did. Fair enough, it was pretty much impossible to avoid this week. But did you hear about all the crazy stuff he does in Fortnite? The dancing and all that? Oh yeah, you heard about that too. But which game should the mad titan guest star in next? That's the subject of today's midweek PCG Q&A, where we ask the global PC Gamer team what they think about a subject related to PC gaming. 

It's worth saying that some spoilers for Avengers: Infinity War follow, if you haven't had time to see it yet, as well as some questionable photoshopping. We'd love to read your answers in the comments, too, and will assume you're taking this as seriously as we are.

Andy Kelly: Dear Esther

It's exactly the same game, in every way, except the narration is performed by Josh Brolin doing the Thanos voice. So it'll be the same haunting story of a man roaming a metaphysical Hebridean island, tormented by guilt, piecing together the shattered fragments of his subconscious, but with the booming voice of a cartoon supervillain. And instead of scouring the island for subtle environmental clues to help embellish the sparse, enigmatic storyline, you're looking for magic crystals to put in your big gold glove, so you can punch someone I guess? I don't know anything about Thanos. Sorry. I'm a DC guy.

Wes Fenlon: Glover

Editor's note: Wes emailed this over with no additional context.

Jarred Walton: The Witcher

You'll just have to imagine Thanos in the bath. 

You'll just have to imagine Thanos in the bath. 

I think Thanos needs to reevaluate his life and consider becoming the next Witcher. He's pretty slow in Fortnite but has clear potential. Add some mutagens and potions to give him some speed, and give him the kind and gentle rearing that places like Kaer Morhen are known to provide, and maybe he wouldn't be hellbent on destroying the universe. Plus, there are people just dying to write some Thanos fanfic, and the Witcher world would be a perfect fit. Who doesn't want to see that broad, radiator-chin face in a dark fantasy setting?

Evan Lahti: XCOM

Thanos wouldn't be out of place in XCOM 2 as a mod. Imagine him dropping into a level like another one of The Chosen (fellow purple-skinned aliens), spouting lines ripped from the movie. Your XCOM squad would have to secure the Chaos Emeralds—erm, Infinity Gems—as innocent bystanders tried to escape the scene.  

Samuel Roberts: Gone Home

I made this in 30 seconds.

Evan's suggestion is so good I can't really top it. Of course Thanos would make a great Chosen-style XCOM bad guy. If millions of kids were playing XCOM instead of Fortnite, that would've happened by now, but this is not the reality we live in. 

Instead, I'll go for Gone Home, where, spoilers, you could argue that Thanos has already acted with the Infinity Gauntlet, since the Greenbriar family has vanished. Or they've just gone for a walk. I can't remember what happened in that game now, it's been a long five years, but let's just assume the rest of the family were in the half of the universe that got turned to dust. 

Philippa Warr: Dota 2

Thanos could make for an interesting Dota 2 character. I guess spoilers follow because I'm about to outline a skillset:

I'm thinking of stepping away from the tradition of getting your ultimate ability at level 6. The idea of collecting Infinity Stones would translate into collecting one gem per unique hero kill. So if you manage to kill each member of the opposing side at least once you get access to your Infinity Gauntlet. I've not settled on exactly what that would do, though. Perhaps it could instantly wipe half the health of a target player or unit, or perhaps it could switch off two of their abilities for a certain time leaving them only half their skillset. Or, if it wasn't an ultimate ability but more of an extra skill which you rarely earn because a full suite of kills is hard, then perhaps it gives you the ability to wipe out half of a creep wave or jungle camp when you use it.

 

Chris Livingston: Her Story

I haven't seen Infinity War yet, but the villains in Marvel movies have been mostly pretty dull. We spend plenty of time with the heroes and learn their thoughts and feelings and histories, but how about a nice deep backstory for Thanos, extracted piece by piece via Her Story's video clips? I'd spend a few hours listening to Thanos and trying to determine if he murdered someone (or a few billion someones). The key to a good villain is understanding their motivations and perspective beyond "I'm evil" and a day spent putting together Thanos' story like a jigsaw puzzle would be time well spent. He might even play a little guitar. 

Tyler Wilde: EVE Online

Such an artful work of propaganda (Google 'is Thanos right?' and weep) would obviously be at home in EVE Online. Have Thanos threaten to delete half the players' accounts unless they defeat him, just so we can watch. It'd be a good show, if nothing else. 

Tim Clark: Dota 2

Maybe it could be an asymmetric mode where one team still has the regular five heroes, while the other team is just one asshole kid playing Thanos. It'd probably be awful. Like a top-down version of Evolve, with five people growing increasingly furious at Thanos team-wiping them with his vajazzled death mitten. Spoiler: I do not play MOBAs.  

PC Gamer

The collective PC Gamer editorial team worked together to write this article. PC Gamer is the global authority on PC games—starting in 1993 with the magazine, and then in 2010 with this website you're currently reading. We have writers across the US, UK and Australia, who you can read about here.