Elden Ring Nightreign's newest Everdark Sovereign Augur, manages to break the fourth wall by sending me to sleep in the game and in real life

I've been itching to play a new Everdark Sovereign for a while now, ever since FromSoftware introduced a round-robin of old Everdarks to Elden Ring Nightreign, including Gaping Jaw, Sentient Pest, and Darkdrift Knight.

I played these Everdark variants so much that fights were starting to become silly, as my teammates and I saw each and every attack coming from a mile away; needless to say, the fights became very dull. So the news that a whole new group of Nightlords were getting a revamp was music to my ears, except when it was announced that Augur would be the first one up to bat.

No shade, but Augur kind of sucks. Its boss fight is by far the weakest out of all the Nightlords as it delicately floats around and poops out an atomic bomb every once and a while. But I went into its Everdark run with high hopes that this would be something of a dark horse. How foolish of me.

Augur's Everdark boss fight is better, but not by much. You fight plain old Augur to start, which is easy enough. After you defeat it, a drop appears with a vamped-up version of your starter weapon, with a nifty ability, Storm Ruler.

This is pretty much the only thing that can properly hurt Everdark Augur, something that isn't necessarily spelt out to you. After a few ults in Augur's face, I quickly figured out that something wasn't right, and that I should give this new weapon another look. So I tried it out, and used the Storm Ruler attack, and just like that, a big chunk of Augur's health was gone. Sadly, my teammates didn't have the same revelation.

I'm sure if you have the whole team spamming Storm Ruler, you can deplete Everdark Augur's health pretty quickly, but I didn't, so instead it was like pulling teeth. Every so often, I'd desperately spam the 'Hello' prattling pate and then perform the move in an effort to help my teammates connect the dots, but it was no use.

Needless to say, we died, but not after enduring the longest, most painstakingly boring boss fight that I've ever encountered. Augur won't kill you if you can't figure out how to fight it; unlike other bosses, it'll keep you living just so you can hopelessly watch it prance from one side of the map to the other, pooping out little bombs that you can't destroy. It's the kind of move I'd expect Libra to pull in all honesty.

I do, however, appreciate the fact that FromSoftware is still just using Nightreign to try out new ideas. Ideas which may not always work, but are a cool thought nevertheless. I will say that it makes every other weapon you gather during the build-up to the fight useless, so my advice instead would be to invest in effects, particularly walking ones or anything to do with lightning, as that's Everdark Augur's weakness.

All in all, this fight was certainly a step up from Augur's regular boss fight, but not by much. And I have to admit that it made me lose faith in humanity for a split second as I watched my two teammates shoot volleys of arrows into Augur's chest to absolutely no effect, but they never stopped trying, so good on them for that.

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