When Wolfenstein 3D released in 1992, the game was missing one crucial feature: the ability to pat dogs. Instead, the dogs in Wolfenstein 3D were prone to biting you, and the only way to retaliate was to brutally murder them. Sure, they were dogs belonging to Nazis, but that didn't mean the dogs themselves were Nazis. When you think about it, the dog violence is unacceptable.
Anyway, there's a mod for this particular predicament now. Dubbed Return to Castle Woofenstein, or Woof3D, not only does it let you pat the dogs until they have a snooze, but it totally removes nazis from the game.
"There's a big ol' castle full of dogs wanting pats and you're the one to pet them," reads creator's description. "Sorry, they jump up on you, I hope you don't mind dog paw prints on your jeans. Just pat them and they'll fall asleep pretty quick."
No, I don't mind dog paw prints on my jeans. What the creator failed to mention, however, is that the dogs can kill you in their enthusiastic leaping for affection. It's a video game, so something has to die, right?
While a mod, the install doesn't require a copy of Wolf3D. You will need DOSBox though, but if you don't have it, the .zip file on the itch.io page has it bundled in.
Check it out here.