Funcom's please-oh-please-let-it-be-good conspiracy MMO The Secret World isn't open for business yet, but you can sign up to be in the first wave (no relation to the rubbish Nostradamus vs. Aliens rubbish from 1998) of beta. So far, so standard. There's a neat twist to this one though in that signing up isn't just a case of putting your e-mail address into a form. First, you have to choose which of the three major secret societies to join - the shadowy Dragon, shadowier Templars or shadowiest Illuminati - either by clicking on one like a boring person, or taking a quick personality test to assign your allegiance.
The test is a much more interesting option. "Which powerful force would you choose to harness?" asks one question. "Which of your enemy's chakras should you target?" My favourite though? "You've received the malfunctioning smartphone of an enemy. Which clue concerns you most? a) A sticker on the case of an ANGEL'S HALO, b) That you can trigger audio of MONKS CHATTING on a phone's MP3 player, or c) that an image of a SHADOWY COUNCIL keeps fritzing in and out."
There's an app for that. Soon there'll be an MMO too. Register online here. No word yet on when you'll be allowed into the Secret World or start fighting the Secret Wall, but the game is due out next April.