We’re through our first week and a half of Fallout 4 and the strangest things to happen so far aren’t because of the inherent absurdity of the Bostonian wasteland. As is the tradition with Bethesda’s open worlds and internet culture, the best of Fallout 4 is emerging from the creative ways in which people tinker with the game and the commotion around such a big release, rather than the game itself. Let’s catch up with what’s what in the wasteland so far.
Radroaches have had enough
There are a bunch of Jurassic Park jokes here that I really don’t have the energy to touch. Point is, radroaches are smarting up and using garbage bins as armor. I encountered this myself and I’ve heard about it happening to a lot of people in the same spot near the beginning of the game. Makes me wonder if it’s an intentional bit by Bethesda to get some early laughs going. Or maybe the code is sentient and sick of getting smooshed. Either way, it’s a fun example of the AI and physics accidentally working in tandem to produce quality Internet Content.
Creativity with console commands is where Bethesda’s games find their real longevity. There’s no shortage of amusing things you can do. For instance, you can spawn a hell of a lot of melons and set it to classical music. This video is exactly that, and it’s pretty glorious. It’s also arguable that the adult entertainment site mentioned later in the roundup may have had a dip in traffic not just because Fallout 4 came out, but because videos like this have encroached on their search engine optimization.
Someone erased years of trust with the Pip-Boy app
Over on Reddit, someone found out an insidious way to mess with their brother via the Pip-Boy app. Since you just need to be on the same network and enable the option in game for the application to work, it seems he’s been repeatedly changing his brother’s equipped clothes. I’m super into the idea, just a little worried about the guy: “I feel like a god. He is also a little bit high and thinks he is going insane.” I highly recommend everyone try this with their loved ones immediately.
A player is growing 'corn' in their garage
Nothing to see here, Mister Garvey.
You can actually call Vault-Tec
Turns out the number listed on a calendar in the opening sequence of the game actually rings up Vault-Tec, or at least a prerecorded message. It's a fun little easter egg that has no reason to exist, but does, and shows the depths to which Bethesda goes when conisdering the finer details. One detail they probably didn't consider is that if you dial 1-800 instead of 1-888, you ring up one of America's hottest talk lines.
A Deathclaw horde versus a Brotherhood of Steel army
Again, thank goodness for console commands. A YouTuber has been doing what we all expected, and has been spawning huge armies of enemies to fight one another. My favorite so far is Deathclaws versus Brotherhood of Steel, because he doesn't spawn them all at once in an open arena, but places the two groups in a choke point, and continually creates more Deathclaws in new locations to give the battle a bit more drama. Here's how to make massive Fallout 4 battles of your own.
‘Melee builds aren’t viable.’
Adult entertainment websites weren't feeling it
Fact: naked people doing naked people things are significantly less interesting than planting a few rows of corn in virtual irradiated soil. Okay, so correlation does not equal causation, but VentureBeat talked to some folks at a prominent adult entertainment website, and they claim that traffic dipped by 10 percent on release day “among gamers” (however that stat is determined).
"Every so often I'll be sneaking and notice that the status says [CAUTION] but nobody is visible." After clearing out an area for the Minutemen, a player accidentally shot an ally and set Preston Garvey on a creepy, implacable murder quest. Now everywhere they go, Preston Garvey makes a preternatural beeline towards them no matter where they're at. "He's found me near the castle, near the Boston Commons, and I even saw his irradiated outline charging me from across The Glowing Sea." It's a horrifying and beautiful quirk that feels at home in Bethesda's open worlds. We wish them luck, not that there's any real escape from the inevitable.
What a tool
Doing a good job there, buddy. Keep it up.
Headshots can have interesting effects
Shoot me once, shame on me. Shoot me twice...
A compelling argument for never finishing the game
At least the writers still get a credit.
Don't lose your head, unless you do
I refuse to call this a glitch. This is a feature. A player got into a minor tussle with a Deathclaw, and after a few might swipes of those mitts, the player's head came off. Typically, this results in a slow motion, ragdoll fall to the ground, followed by a quick load of your last save. This time, the player stayed alive, decapitated. Horrifying, yeah? Even better is that the permanent head loss meant his perception skill was entirely drained, but enemies couldn't hit him in the head, considering there no was no head to hit. We need mods, stat. Horse-riding mod and a few ghoulish capes, maybe a pumpkin helmet? Please.
Someone modded their dog into Fallout 4
Dogmeat may not have been our PC Gamer Virtual Kennel Club winner, but the results might have been different if I could mod my own dog into the game. One such Fallout player did just that, using photos of their blue cattle pup (who is just the cutest) to reskin Dogmeat into something a bit more personal. This entry, while not funny, deserves inclusion because the dog is cute, and we always have time for cute dogs.
But Dogmeat is still dumb...
To be fair, all those laser traps would probably grab the attention of any dog.
For crying out loud, Dogmeat
bethesda.mp4 pic.twitter.com/TNqrcrVRJK November 16, 2015
bethesda.mp4 pic.twitter.com/TNqrcrVRJK November 16, 2015