I've been working PC Gamer's news mine for almost a year now. In all that time, I haven't once used the words "Blizzard" and "sale" in the same article. Well okay, I used them once to describe something Blizzard were selling, but never in the sense of temporarily cheaper products. That all changes today, when those words get to meet in their very own sentence: Blizzard is holding a Black Friday sale. As a result of this rarest of events, the prices of World of Warcraft and Starcraft 2 have been dramatically slashed worldwide.
Here's what's on offer:
75% off World of Warcraft
50% off StarCraft II
Can you spot what's missing from that list? Of Diablo III's absence, Blizzard write : "Our treasure goblin scouts have also sighted a few special deals on Diablo III for the PS3, Xbox 360, and PC/Mac, but only at select retail locations. Check with your local retailer for details and availability." Despite that, I did check with my local retailer - which is called The Internet - and there were no deals to be found.
I'm not American, but from what I can gather, Black Friday is the result of a curse placed on the country by a mischievous wizard. It dictates that once a year, an uncontrollable desire for discounted kitchenware and electronic goods drives the population into an inhuman rage. It is a time of great suffering and panic, and I pray the safety of our American readers as they gouge and tear their way toward a cheap blender or blu-ray player.