Yes, you can pet the hefty Viking cats in Assassin's Creed Valhalla

I tried petting the dogs, but they surrounded me and ate my horse. Assassin's Creed Valhalla labeled them wolves, so that's on me. That's my mistake. Lucky for us the cats are as big as dogs and not only can you pet them, but they're demanding it. 

I got to play six hours of Assassin's Creed Valhalla. Go read my big take on all the sidequests here. But stick around this page for the premium content. 

Check out this poofy honker hanging out in my Viking settlement's longhouse. 

(Image credit: Ubisoft)

The absolute delight on that massive face. Whew. Look at Eivor. Now look at the cat. Their heads are pretty comparable in size. So now I'm sitting here thinking about what would happen if my cat's head was as big as mine and I'm honestly feeling a little messed up about it. 

No more ignoring their cries for more food even though they just ate. What if they smother me in my sleep? And god forbid they get outside. I'm trying not to think about the pile of big-ass toad and rabbit corpses on the welcome mat. 

So as much as I want to bury my face in something so adorable and affectionate and large, it's probably a good thing domesticated housecats can't eat our faces so easily. At least Valhalla will let us live out the fantasy. 

James Davenport

James is stuck in an endless loop, playing the Dark Souls games on repeat until Elden Ring and Silksong set him free. He's a truffle pig for indie horror and weird FPS games too, seeking out games that actively hurt to play. Otherwise he's wandering Austin, identifying mushrooms and doodling grackles.