Game of Checkers, Part 9: a tiny drama in CK2's Game of Thrones mod

The Nice Try

I handle the situation in the time-honored fashion practiced by squabbling brothers everywhere: by tattling. I appeal to my Queen to intervene, and she does. She orders Needrick to give up his revolt. He obeys.

Checkers

Though the revolt is settled, the situation remains the same: my brothers hate me and want me out. War clearly isn't the solution, since our armies are so small. I clearly need to think of a new and novel way to handle this. Something subtle, something clever, some incredibly devious political maneuver. I can’t think of anything, though, so I just try the exact same thing again: the moment the revolt is shut down, I try to arrest Needrick for a second time. This time, I catch the jerk!

I take Needrick’s gold, I strip him of his lands and titles, and throw him out of The Fingers to serve in celibacy on The Wall. He arrives there just in time to see Petyr Baelish Jr., who I sent there ages ago, die of depression. Welcome to the Night's Watch!

Checkers

I'm not done yet. I march over to Pebble, to take care of my other scheming brother. He doesn't stand much of a chance, and I quickly sack his tiny keep and haul him off to my dungeon in chains. Only briefly, though: I send him packing to join his brother at The Wall.

My problems with House Baelish aren’t done, however. Ser Denys, the instigator of the plot, is still trying to challenge my claim on The Fingers. On his side is pretty much my entire court. See, when you have two brothers who are also your vassals, and you imprison them and strip them of their lands and all their money and banish them to a future of freezing cold and zombie attacks, it doesn’t make anyone want to serve you.

If I could just arrest Ser Denys and do the same to him! Unfortunately, he’s out of pocket, living in another castle, so I can't grab him. I try something I doubt will work: I invite him to visit my court. I'm completely mind-boggled to see that he accepts! What an idiot! Why would he willingly come here? I thought those Littlefingers were supposed to be shrewd.

Checkers

Shrewd, maybe not, but slippery, definitely. With a whopping 71% chance of arresting him, I somehow miss and he slips away. He flees to The Wall, ironically, and immediately becomes Castellan there. His plot power against me is now up to 94%. I’m so distracted that when my second son is born, I just name him Phil.

His plot continues to grow, and quickly rises to 100%. I grow incredibly desperate and try one crazy, last-ditch scheme. I decide to try being nice. I ask Denys Baelish if he wouldn't mind—pretty please—to stop plotting against me.

Checkers

He agrees. Plot ended. Huh.

The nice approach... worked? Maybe that's something to keep in mind.

Continue to Part 10.

Christopher Livingston
Senior Editor

Chris started playing PC games in the 1980s, started writing about them in the early 2000s, and (finally) started getting paid to write about them in the late 2000s. Following a few years as a regular freelancer, PC Gamer hired him in 2014, probably so he'd stop emailing them asking for more work. Chris has a love-hate relationship with survival games and an unhealthy fascination with the inner lives of NPCs. He's also a fan of offbeat simulation games, mods, and ignoring storylines in RPGs so he can make up his own.