Psssst. Hey. Hey buddy. I got a sweet tip for you. Were you followed? Are you sure? OK, good. Now listen:
Steam Summer Sale
Yeah, you heard me. I got word from the Russians, you know how those guys are. Couldn't keep a secret if the Kremlin depended on it.
Don't look so surprised. We all knew it was coming, we just didn't know when. Then one of my operatives, a guy by the name of
, left a dead drop under a bench in the park. In it, I found a picture with some hastily translated Russian code: The
Sale starts July 11.
Our analysts have noted that no new games are being released on Steam between now and July 23, which seems to be a nice window for a lot of deals, and Valve has been consistent: no new games come out during the sales. Looks like they're keeping their people in check for the big event.
One of our new guys—you know, the one with the hair?—he spotted that the
Midweek Madness deals
are ending six hours earlier than usual, like they're getting out of the way for something bigger. He's got talent, that kid. Keep an eye on him.
We've all been preparing for this. I hope you've been stockpiling your supplies.
This message will self destruct by spending too much money tomorrow. Good luck, and godspeed.
that their agent (Codename: Anthony) intercepted a communication from Valve itself, confirming that the Steam Sale begins tomorrow. This is not a drill, people.