Who's in the mood for some election results? Huh? Anyone? Huh? Well, 51% of you might be, at least, so let's get right to it. On Saturday we asked you to vote for The President of PC Games, as well as Vice President, Secretary of State, Secretary of Defense, and a host of other (typically appointed) positions. Over 13,000 of you participated, and here are the results.
The President of PC Games
For most of the polling period, this was an extremely tight race between a murderous robot and a graphics card. GLaDOS, the candidate from Portal, and the GeForce GTX 1080, a GPU from Nvidia, were neck and neck, both with 19.2% of the votes. On Monday, however, GLaDOS began to slowly but surely pull away, and wound up with a decisive 19.4%. While we get busy installing her in the ceiling of the Oval Office, we should also note Nvidia's GPU took 18.5% of the vote.
In third place with 14.8% was MGS 5's Big Boss, followed by Command and Conquer's Kane and Bioshock's Andrew Ryan, while Lara Croft, D.Va, John Henry Eden, and the BFG fought over the smaller slices.
Taking about 5% of the votes were a number of write-in candidates, such as Adam Jensen, an AMD RX 480, Barbas the Talking Dog, Basic Campfire, an AWP, Commander Shepard, Corvo Attano, Deez Nutz, Doom Guy, Dorito Pope, Dr. Breen, G-Man, Gabe, Gabe Newell, GabeN, Lord Gaben, LORD GABEN, Harambe, Crypto, Illusive Man, J.C. Denton, Jebediah Kerman, John Stamos, Keith David, Leeroy Jenkins, Liberty Prime, Master Chief, Lu Bu, McCree, Overlord, Pagan Min, Saxton Hale, Sherogath, Ulfric Stormcloak, Wheately, Your Mom, and finally, "my charcater (sic) in Wow he's lvl 100."
Congratulations to President GLaDOS! As for the rest: you are all losers.
The position of Vice President was never truly in doubt. While Mordin Solus from Mass Effect 2 briefly took a lead on day one, he was quickly outpaced by the best right-hand box a President could ask for, the Weighted Companion Cube from Portal.
It's an All-Portal Presidency! Please report to your designated test chambers.
Below, you can check out the rest of the polls. Most races weren't all that close, but still fun to watch.
We'll entrust our foreign affairs to Agent 47, our new Secretary of State. Meanwhile, Handsome Jack of Borderlands is our Secretary of the Treasury after outpacing Elizabeth, the coin-collecting time-traveler from Bioshock Infinite.
Our Secretary of Defense is the phrase "War, war never changes," which I am sure will serve honorably even though it is, frankly, just a collection of words and a bit of a fib. Geralt of Rivia is our Attorney General, and who could ask for a better top lawman?
The position of our Secretary of Commerce goes to Garrett of Thief, though it was a pretty close contest, and he just won out over The Merchant from RE4. Trade Prince Gallywix from WoW didn't fare too terribly either. Meanwhile, the Medic from TF2 became Secretary of Heath and Human Services by taking more than half the votes (presumably after renouncing his German citizenship), trouncing Max Payne, Dysentary, and Manny Cavalera.
Vault Boy of Fallout fame is your new Secretary of Housing and Urban Development by a wide margin, and GTA 5's Franklin is deservedly the Secretary of Transportation.
Shocking no one, Half-Life's Gordon Freeman is the Secretary of Energy, and The Elder Scrolls' M'aiq the Liar is Secretary of Education. Here's hoping Gordon does more than push a cart into a slot, and M'aiq slips in a few tidbits of truth now and then.
Our final race was pretty close, but Duke Nukem is our Secretary of Homeland Security, just edging out XCOM 2's Commander, which presumably would've been you. I feel safer already.
Thanks to everyone who voted! See you in four years for the next one. We hope.