Goat Simulator 1.1 patch notes promise addition of even more goats

Shaun Prescott

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Goat Simulator

One of the worst things that could happen in Goat Simulator is for there to be too few goats. The new Goat Simulator 1.1 update will preemptively strike against this terror with the promise that new goats will be added. There is a reason you are playing Goat Simulator after all: you want to be around goats.

Patch notes aren't the most exciting texts in the world but the Goat Simulator 1.1 patch notes are very interesting. They detail actual improvements, such as the addition of local splitscreen multiplayer and a new map, but they also include such zingers as "Deadmau5 has finally left EDM. Is now making Goatronica" (this isn't true, by the way!). There's also going to be a Minecraft mini-game , because there is no actual reason why there shouldn't be a Minecraft mini-game.

Other key additions include the ability to wallrun ("stand by for Goatfall") and a lot of "buckets of optimisation", but in all seriousness you'd be better off reading the full patch notes yourself. Honestly. The patch is available June 4.

  • Added local splitscreen multiplayer
  • Added a new map, try it out in the “custom game” section
  • The humans have been given a brain with the cognitive abilities of a 4 year old
  • Humans consequently learned to speak. You'll wish they hadn't.
  • Added more goats
  • Isn't this kid super cute? http://vimeo.com/95834056
  • Made fun of Michael Bay. Again. Please don't sue.
  • Added more powers
  • Fixed the hitbox of flappy goat
  • Poured several buckets full of Optimization™ into the game
  • Made sure no class differences exists in Goat City Bay
  • Added tons of achievements
  • You can now run along walls
  • You can now run up walls
  • Stand by for Goatfall
  • Changed batteries in our fire alarm
  • The Goats have learned to ride bikes, press R to mount.
  • The Goats have learned to ride longboards, press R to mount.
  • The Humans have learned how to ride Goats
  • Enjoyed flappy goat
  • You can now buy hats for money
  • This woman made her skin look 20 years younger DOCTORS HATE HER click here
  • Fixed display of Int enchantments on crafted gear
  • Applying plastic wrap around your screen will now give you a 3D-effect.
  • Added VR support
  • Reverted hitbox of flappy goat
  • Made hitbox worse on flappygoat
  • Removed Flappy Goat, I hate that fucking game.
  • Got 11 points on Flappy Goat; readded Flappy Goat.
  • Spent more time writing jokes about Flappy Goat than working on the patch
  • Changed the points required for the Flappy Goat Achievement from 10 to 30
  • Just kidding.
  • Removed VR support
  • Ultra-realistic water simulation
  • Fire alarm still beeping
  • You can now swim. Well not really swim, more like float around in a semi-controlled buoyant propulsion fashion.
  • Added volume slider in options for NPC speech.
  • Deadmau5 has finally left EDM. Is now making Goatronica.
  • We went to see Godzilla. It was ok. Cool sound effects.
  • Updated patch notes.
  • Added a lot of new sound effects.
  • Mary had a little ... GOAT!? Historians uncover new evidence, click here!
  • There is a new game inside of the game, it's called SteamWorld Goat.
  • Honored Notch
  • Changed batteries in fire alarm. Again.
  • Wanted to add shadows to buildable blocks but couldn't figure out how, can someone please tell us?
  • Patch notes now covers more than an A4.
  • Seriously stop making threads asking about patch notes 4 seconds after the patch goes live, calm down
  • Game downloading, does anyone have the patch notes?
  • New patch?
  • Patch released today does anyone know what it does
  • Where are the patch notes
  • Fire alarm still beeping
  • Why is the patch so big?
  • Lazy devs.
  • If you want we can zip it, then rar it to make it smaller. Do you want it on Megaupload?
  • Is this game worth it? Should I buy?
  • Devs please put the game on a sale so I can save 4 bucks
  • I don't like ___, please add an option to remove ___
  • Performed Satanic rituals to summon Phil Fish
  • Plz come back
  • Actually optimized the game a bit
  • What use are ladders when you can run on the walls?
  • I hate water
  • Played a whole lot of Wildstar
  • Volvo pls fix ___.
  • Added a Capture the Flag game mode.
  • Added Uncle Goat, I'm sorry about my Goat.
  • Added a Capture the Flag game mode.
  • Added five new colors, all of which are unseeable by the human eye.
  • We actually bought a stuffed goat head IRL for our office, we have no idea what to do with it.
  • Updated our Meta Score to 91/100.
  • Killed PC gaming
  • How long will the patch notes be?
  • Changed batteries in the other fire alarm
  • Increased Storm Spirit's Static Remnant AoE by 15.
  • Ride a bike with a human on your back. Not like this dude.

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