Dear Square Enix, all I want for Christmas is Final Fantasy Tactics on PC

Dear Square Enix,

I think I've been pretty good this year. I've written some articles about videogames that I'm proud of, like this one about how Japan learned to embrace the PC. And I did some deep, important investigative work, too—about one of your own games, no less!—in Why the hell do they have mouths: a Final Fantasy 7 PC retrospective. I read several books and didn't recline my airplane seat on anyone who wasn't also reclining. That, if nothing else, should paint me as a person of fine moral fiber.

So I don't feel like I'm being unreasonable here when I ask for a small gift. Just a trifle, really! I'm not asking you to put me in the game, or anything. (Please don't put me in the game and make me a weirdo who's sexually attracted to chocobos).

I don't want a lot for Christmas. Really, there's just one thing I need. I don't even care about the presents, underneath the Christmas tree! I just want Final Fantasy Tactics on my PC.

I'll keep this brief, because I've already given you a pretty great list of reasons why Final Fantasy Tactics would be better on PC than any other platform. I haven't forgotten, and I'm still waiting! So if you want to just whip up a port over the weekend, I can't imagine a better Christmas gift than Final Fantasy Tactics on my laptop.

if I'm being honest, 2018 would be fine, too. I'm just asking—won't you make my dreams come true?

Don't do me like this, Square!